Here in the UK, today is Mother’s Day – a fact I only became aware of just a few days ago! However, it will pass almost unnoticed in our house. Now, that isn’t down to my grown up children forgetting about it! Nor is it that I’m anti Mother’s Day – I have celebrated it in the past. However, in recent years I’ve preferred not to celebrate it. This post will hopefully explain why.
The most obvious reason that I don’t celebrate it is that I no longer have a Mum. My lovely Mum died almost 8 years ago and since then Mother’s Day hasn’t really been of any interest. Thankfully, a few companies are now recognising that Mother’s Day can be difficult for some people and send out an email a few week’s beforehand, giving you an option to opt out of Mother’s Day emails. Other people often don’t understand my decision not to celebrate the day and I’ve had well meaning friends say things like “You should celebrate it because you’re a Mum” and “We’ve all had a Mum and that should be celebrated”. However for me, it’s just another reminder that my Mum’s not there anymore. So, today I may get my son saying “Happy Mother’s Day” to me and possibly a Facebook message from my daughter saying the same and that’s just fine. However, if I don’t get that, well that’s fine too!
Another reason I don’t celebrate it is that my two children show me throughout the year what I mean to them. This can be coming to have a chat, giving me a hug, checking in via Facebook Messenger when they’re not at home, bringing in a surprise treat, making a cup of tea etc. As a result, I don’t need them to have a special day where they’re guilt tripped by various companies into buying me something (often at an increased cost) to tell me they love me. I already know that they do!
Personally, I’ve found that over the years, like so many big celebration days, it’s become far too commercial. In the weeks leading up to Mother’s Day, you get bombarded by advertising emails from companies you’ve used in the past trying to get you to spend your money with them rather than one of their rivals for Mother’s Day. As I said earlier, at least some of them now give you the option to opt out of them. You also notice that shops start increasing the cost of flowers, chocolates and other ‘ideal presents for Mum’ in the run up to the day. Although, over the years I’ve had some lovely presents from my children, I always preferred the card and present that they made at school because it was made by them with love. It was always so much better than anything shop bought!
As I mentioned previously, Mother’s Day is a day which serves as a yearly reminder that I don’t have a Mum. I’m not alone in this as many people are in a similar position to me. However, other people can find it equally difficult because their child has died or because they are unable to have children. Others may find it hard because they never had a good relationship with their Mum. If you pray, why not spend some time this Mother’s Day praying for those who find the day difficult each year?
If you’re celebrating Mother’s Day, I hope you have a lovely day being spoilt by your children. If, like me, you’re not then enjoy whatever you do today. If you find it difficult, then go gently and look after yourself.
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